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Have you ever

4 aprilie 2009 darkm3n 1 comentariu

Am primit leapsa de la Andrei . Am de bolduit pe lista asta chestiile pe care le-am facut. 

Have you ever…

01) Bought everyone in the pub a drink
02) Swam with wild dolphins
03) Climbed a mountain.

04) Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05) Been inside the Great Pyramid
06) Held a tarantula.
07) Taken a candlelight bath with someone.
08) Said ‘I love you’ and meant it

09) Hugged a tree.
10) Done a striptease
11) Bungee jumped
12) Visited Paris
13) Watched a lightning storm at sea
14) Stayed up all night long, and watch the sun rise
15) Seen the Northern Lights
16) Gone to a huge sports game
17) Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa.
18) Grown and eaten your own vegetables
19) Touched an iceberg
20) Slept under the stars.

21) Changed a baby’s diaper.
22) Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
23) Watched a meteor shower

24) Gotten drunk on champagne
25) Given more than you can afford to charity
26) Looked up at the night sky through a telescope

27) Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
28) Had a food fight
29) Bet on a winning horse
30) Taken a sick day when you’re not ill.
31) Asked out a stranger

32) Had a snowball fight
33) Photocopied your bottom on the office photocopier
34) Screamed as loudly as you possibly can

35) Held a lamb.
36) Enacted a favorite fantasy.
37) Taken a midnight skinny dip
38) Taken an ice cold bath
39) Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar
40) Seen a total eclipse

41) Ridden a roller coaster
42) Hit a home run
43) Fit three weeks miraculously into three days
44) Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking

45) Adopted an accent for an entire day
46) Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
47) Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
48) Had two hard drives for your computer

49) Visited all 50 states of USA
50) Loved your job for all accounts
51) Taken care of someone who was shit faced

52) Had enough money to be truly satisfied
53) Had amazing friends  
54) Danced with a stranger in a foreign country !
55) Watched wild whales
56) Stolen a sign

57) Backpacked in Europe

58) Taken a road-trip
59) Rock climbing
60) Lied to foreign government’s official in that country to avoid notice
61) Midnight walk on the beach
62) Sky diving
63) Visited Ireland
64) Been heartbroken longer then you were actually in love

65) In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
66) Visited Japan
67) Benchpressed your own weight
68) Milked a cow
69) Alphabetized your records
70) Pretended to be a superhero
71) Sung karaoke
72) Lounged around in bed all day

73) Posed nude in front of strangers
74) Scuba diving
75) Got it on to “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye
76) Kissed in the rain

77) Played in the mud

78) Played in the rain
79) Gone to a drive-in theater
80) Done something you should regret, but don’t regret it
81) Visited the Great Wall of China
82) Discovered that someone who’s not supposed to have known about your blog has discovered your blog
83) Dropped Windows in favor of something better

84) Started a business
85) Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
86) Toured ancient sites
87) Taken a martial arts class
88) Sword fought for the honor of a woman
89) Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
90) Gotten engaged
91) Been in a movie
92) Crashed a party
93) Loved someone you shouldn’t have

94) Kissed someone so passionately it made them dizzy
95) Gotten married
96) Had sex at the office
97) Gone without food for 5 days
98) Made cookies from scratch
99) Won first prize in a costume contest
100) Ridden a gondola in Venice
101) Gotten a tattoo
102) Found that the texture of some materials can turn you on
103) Gotten divorced
104) Been on television news programs as an “expert”
105) Got flowers for no reason

106) Masturbated in a public place
107) Got so drunk you don’t remember anything
108) Taken illegal drugs

109) Performed on stage
110) Been to Las Vegas
111) Recorded music
112) Eaten shark

113) Had a one-night stand
114) Gone to Thailand
115) Seen Siouxsie live
116) Bought a house
117) Been in a combat zone
118) Buried one/both of your parents
119) Shaved or waxed your pubic hair off
120) Been on a cruise ship
121) Spoken more than one language fluently
122) Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone
123) Bounced a check
124) Performed in Rocky Horror
125) Read – and understood – your credit report
126) Raised children.
127) Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy.
128) Followed your favorite band/singer on tour

129) Created and named your own constellation of stars
130) Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
131) Found out something significant that your ancestors did
132) Called or written your Congress person
133) Picked up and moved to another city to just start over

134) …more than once? – More than twice?
135) Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
136) Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking

137) Had an abortion or your female partner did
138) Had plastic surgery
139) Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived

140) Wrote articles for a large publication
141) Lost over 100 pounds
142) Held someone while they were having a flashback
143) Piloted an airplane
144) Petted a stingray
145) Broken someone’s heart
146) Helped an animal give birth
147) Been fired or laid off a job
148) Won money on a T.V. game show
149) Broken a bone
150) Killed a human being
151) Gone on an African photo safari
152) Ridden a motorcycle
153) Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100 mph
154) Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
155) Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol

156) Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
157) Ridden a horse
158) Had major surgery
159) Had sex on a moving train
160) Had a snake as a pet
161) Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
162) Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing
163) Slept for more than 30 hours
164) Visited lots of foreign countries
165) Visited all 7 continents
166) Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
167) Eaten kangaroo meat
168) Fallen in love at an ancient Mayan burial ground
169) Been a sperm or egg donor
170) Eaten sushi
171) Had your picture in the newspaper
172) Had 2 (or more) healthy romantic relationships for over a year in your lifetime
173) Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
174) Gotten someone fired for their actions
175) Gone back to school
176) Parasailed
177) Changed your name
178) Petted a cockroach
179) Eaten fried green tomatoes.
180) Read The Iliad
181) Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read

182) Dined in a restaurant and stolen silverware, plates, cups because your apartment needed them
183) …and gotten 86
ed from the restaurant because you did it so many times, they figured out it was you
184) Taught yourself an art from scratch

185) Killed and prepared an animal for eating
186) Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt

187) Skipped all your school reunions
188) Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language

189) Been elected to public office
190) Written your own computer language
191) Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
192) Had to put someone you love into hospice care
193) Built your own PC from parts

194) Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
195) Had a booth at a street fair
196) Dyed your hair
197) Been a DJ
198) Found out someone was going to dump you via LiveJournal
199) Written your own role playing game
200) Been arrested. ?

 Dau mai departe lu` Cata

Categories: funny

Topul pacalelilor!

1 aprilie 2009 darkm3n 1 comentariu

Una dintre acestea nu s-a petrecut in realitate. Puteti ghici care? Incercati sa nu cautati pe internet. Maine voi da raspunsul.

1.Recolta de macaroane in Elvetia. Faimoasa gluma a secolului trecut apartine postului de radio BBC, care a anuntat in 1957 ca Elvetia nu mai poate face fata stocarii unei senzationale recolte de macaroane, iar fermierii omorau gargaritele ce le puteau compromite stocurile pe timpul iernii. Britanicii, la randul lor, visau deja la frumoase recolte de paste fainoase, intreband BBC cum se cultiva acestea. Raspunsul era politicos : Puneti o mana de macaroane intr-un borcan, turnati apoi putin sos de rosii si ganditi-va la lucrul cel mai bun!

2.In 1980, tot BBC ii mai socheaza o data pe britanici, anuntandu-i ca istoricul ceasornic mecanic devine electronic, pentru a tine pasul cu progresul

3.In 1988, cotidianul francez L`Equipe anunta transferul soc al lui Marco van Basten, noul star al lui AC Milan, la marea rivala, Internationale.

4.In 1994, postul american National Public Radio anunta ca toti cei care isi vor face un tatuaj cu Coca Cola vor primi un discount de 10 la suta pe viata pentru orice produs cu acest logo. Mii de telefoane au sunat apoi la redactia NPR pentru premiu…

5.Arme pentru saraci. In 1999, ziarul Pheonix New Times dadea un anunt umanitar pentru saraci, cerandu-le donatorilor cate un dolar pentru a-i inarma pe cei fara adapost

6.Maradona, la Spartak-Moscova. Izvestia publica in 1998 prima sa gluma, anuntand cu mare pompa ca celebrul fotbalist argentinian Diego Maradona a incheiat un contract cu clubul Spartak-Moscova, pentru sase milioane de dolari!

7.Grenade incrustate cu diamante. In 1996, a fost randul agentiei Itar-Tass sa bulverseze lumea, anuntand ca o fabrica x va produce grenade de mana incrustate cu diamante, pentru ca victimele sa o sfarseasca intre pietre pretioase, nu intr-o balta de sange

8.Turnul Eiffel va fi dezmembrat. Le Parisien se tine de sotii in 1986 si anunta ca celebrul Turn Eiffel este pe cale de a fi dezmembrat. Stirea i-a socat pe francezi, care nu doreau sa-si vada un simbol national prapadindu-se

9.Imparatul Constantin a creat Ziua Pacalelilor. Cu asta si-a pacalit Associated Press in 1983 colegii de presa. Stirea a fost preluata de mai toate ziarele americane. Legenda spunea ca imparatul bizantin l-a pus, chiar de 1 aprilie, pe pacaliciul sau sa conduca timp de o zi imperiul

10.Cadvrul lui Lenin in Disneyland. Irish Times glumea in 1995, scriind ca proprietarii parcului Disneyland negociaza cu guvernul rus pentru a cumpara cadavrul lui Lenin

Leapsa

4 februarie 2009 darkm3n 1 comentariu

Am primit-o de la Andrei

This is somewhat adolescent but still kind of funny! Some of these almost make sense…
RULES:
1. Put your music player on shuffle (ALL MUSIC).
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag 10 friends who might enjoy doing the game as well as the person you got the game from.

P.S. : Nu am prea multa muzica noua in calculator, asa ca sunt sanse mari ca melodiile sa fie destul de vechi.

IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OK” YOU SAY:
Danzel- You Are All Of That

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Daddy Yankee – Gasolina

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
John Cena and the Trademarc – The Time is Now

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Celia – Soapte

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
Ugk Feat. Outkast – International Players Anthem

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
 Helena Paparizou – Mambo(english version)

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Guns ‘n Roses – November Rain

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
Dante Thomas – Get It On

WHAT IS 2 + 2?
Spandau Ballet – To Cut A Long Story Short

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Bere Gratis- Eu Nu Am Sa Te Las

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Armin Van Buuren Feat Sharon Den Adel – In And Out Of Love

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Fara Zahar – Lov Stori

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Narcotic Thrust – I Like It

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
ANTRA & KRISTO – AZ & TI

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Andra – Ramai Cu Mine

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
T.I. feat. Rihanna – Live your life

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
The Corrs – What Can I Do

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Directia 5- Esti Ingerul Meu

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Cheb Mami ft. K-Maro & Comfrom – Nos Couleurs

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Vama Veche – Curvelor, cu drag

WHAT’S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Mariah Carey – Heartbreaker

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Vali Barbulescu feat Giulia – Zbor

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Crime Mobb Feat. Lil Scrappy – Rock Yo Hips

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Arsenium feat.Connect-R & Natalia Gordienko – Loca

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
 Sean Paul – Temperature

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Mihai Margineanu – Balada Femeilor

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
Keo – Azi Vii Maine Pleci

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Holograf- N-am Stiut

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Styles Of Beyond – Hard

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Bob Sinclar – Together

Dau leapsa Andradei, lui Andrei si Andreei

Categories: funny

Top 10

24 noiembrie 2008 darkm3n 1 comentariu

Iata un top mai inedit, un top al celor mai inculti si “tarani” romani! (Atentie ! necenzurat)

Categories: funny, romania europeana Tags: , , ,

Trupa Vama îşi lansează candidatul pentru uninominal

19 noiembrie 2008 darkm3n Lăsați un comentariu

Desi pana in momentul de fata Vama a refuzat orice asociere cu un personaj politic, Porcul, candidat sincer care isi recunoaste provenienta din cocina, a reusit sa-i castige de partea lui.

In aceasta nota, Vama lanseaza cel mai nou videoclip al sau, Tata taie porcu’, care de altfel s-a transformat in clipul electoral al porcului. Piesa este una dintre cele mai vesele de pe noul disc, iar videoclipul, realizat sub forma unei animatii, este o satira la adresa normelor europene si a scenei politice. Piesa este potrivita cu atat mai mult cu cat vine in contextul campaniei electorale, al nemultumirii generale fata de clasa politica romaneasca si al rezultatelor dezamagitoare ale acesteia. Tata taie porcu’ da glas acestor nemultumiri intr-un mod ironic, amuzant.

Pornind de la mesajul piesei Tata taie porcu’, trupa Vama a decis sa sustina un porc adevarat in campania electorala pentru alegerile parlamentare. Membru al Asociatiei Porcii fara Limite, fiind expresia curentului politic de stanga imprejur si avand un program axat pe doctrina ingrasarii in ajun, porcul isi asuma promovarea democratiei, cat si dezvoltarea personala in greutate, in functie si mai ales in bani. Mesajul electoral al porcului este Eu cu mine traim bine.

Porcul isi incepe astazi in mod oficial campania electorala pentru postul de Cel mai mare porc din Parlament. Toti parlamentarii sunt invitati sa-si depuna candidaturile pe www.vamamusic.ro. Daca politicienii nu vor avea curaj sa intre singuri in competitie cu porcul autentic, Vama invita alegatorii sa faca nominalizari pentru Cel mai mare porc din Parlament. Cinci candidati, cei care obtin cele mai multe semnaturi, intra in turul doi de scrutin. Porcul se va califica automat ca doar e campania lui.

Pentru a-si prezenta in public candidatura, porcul va organiza sambata, 22 noiembrie un miting electoral in Piata Constitutiei. Sunt asteptati toti cei care doresc sa intalneasca porcul parlamentar si sa afle mai multe despre planurile sale. Pana atunci, platforma program a porcului poate fi accesata pe www.vamamusic.ro

De asemenea, pentru cei care nu vor avea ocazia sa-l cunoasca personal, porcul va practica alaturi de formatia Vama turismul electoral prin cele mai importante emisiuni de divertisment ale momentului.

Cred ca umorul in Romania s-a nascut din disperare. In spatele acestei farse se afla multa amaraciune…

Amendat pentru că a condus cu 500 km/h

21 octombrie 2008 darkm3n 2 comentarii

Un bărbat din Sinaia a primit o amendă pentru că ar fi condus pe DN 1 cu o viteză-record de 500 de kilometri la oră, anunţă Realitatea.

Şoferul a contestat sancţiunea şi aşteaptă explicaţii din partea celor de la Serviciul Poliţiei Rutiere Ilfov, deoarece maşina sa are o vechime mai mare de 15 ani şi abia trece de 100 de kilometri la oră.

via evz.ro

No comment…. Inca o dovada a “sigurantei” date de Politia Romana.

Turist atacat de urs. Atentie, imagini socante…

12 octombrie 2008 darkm3n 6 comentarii

Categories: funny Tags:

Bancomatul

29 septembrie 2008 darkm3n Lăsați un comentariu

Procedura pentru barbati

1 Oprire in dreptul automatului
2 Coborirea geamului
3 Introducerea cartelei si tastarea codului PIN
4 Introducerea sumei dorite
5 Scoaterea card-ului si scoaterea banilor
6 Ridicarea geamului
7 Plecarea

Procedura pentru femei

1 Oprire dupa automat
2 Parcurgerea in marsarier a distantei necesare pina in dreptul automatului
3 Repornirea motorului inecat
4 Coborirea geamului
5 Gasirea posetei,golirea acesteia pe scaunul pasagerului pentru a localiza cardul
6 Gasirea gentii de machiaj si verificarea machiajului in plafoniera
7 Incercarea introducerii card-ului
8 Deschiderea portierei pentru accesul mai facil la automat data fiind distanta prea mare pina la aceasta
9 Introducerea card-ului
10 Introducerea card-ului in pozitia corecta
11 Reintrare in masina si cautare jurnal care are codul PIN scris pe coperta interioara
12 Introducerea codului PIN
13 Apasare “Cancel” si reintroducerea codului PIN corect
14 Introducerea sumei dorite
15 Reverificarea machiajului in oglinda retrovizoare
16 Scoaterea banilor
17 Golirea posetei, din nou, pentru gasirea portofelului si introducerea banilor in portofel
18 Reverificarea machiajului
19 Parcurgerea a citiva metri
20 Reintoarcerea la automat
21 Recuperarea card-ului
22 Regolirea posetei, gasirea portofelului, punerea card-ului in locasul lui
23 Reverificarea machiajului
24 Repornirea motorului care s-a inecat si demarare
25 Conducerea a 6 pina la 8 km
26 Eliberarea frinei de mina.

Categories: funny Tags: , ,

Remember these songs?

5 septembrie 2008 darkm3n Lăsați un comentariu

Va mai aduceti aminte de aceste melodii?

Valahia – Banana

Non Stop – Jimmy

4U – Amintiri Din Copilarie

O-Zone – De ce pling chitarele

P.S.: Va astept cu alte sugestii de melodii dragute ale unor trupe care acum nu mai sunt.

Ghita a emigrat!

29 iunie 2008 darkm3n 3 comentarii

Melodia “Ghita” a Cleopatrei a ajuns si in Indonezia.